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I have always looked at you with awe especially at times when you are doing many things at once. I have always dreamed of becoming a strong woman like you whose strength is immeasurable. I have always wondered how you can carry so much cross. I have always wanted to have your character who is not afraid to show her real self.  I have always wanted to voice out my opinion like you do. I have always aimed to have your taste when it comes to fashion. I have always wanted to be you.

But I have realized, in the course of my writing, that I can never be you. All I could ever be is me. Me who looks up to you. Me who you have given a strong foundation in life.

You taught me the lessons of life over dinners and jeepney trips. You told me things I sometimes need not hear just so I know. We still bathe together and hold hands each night. You taught me how to cook your own version of my favorite adobo. You corrected my notion of “ayoko na” to “kaya ko pa.” You taught me how to fly, flew with me, and continuously watch my back as I explore the world.

I could never thank you for all of these, but I’ll try: Thank you for waking up at midnight just to give me meds when I was a sick little girl. Thank you for taking over my household chores when I am not feeling well. Thanks for giving all that you have just so I could have more. Thanks for being so strong whenever I feel weak. Thanks for sacrificing your own good so that you could give me the best.

I love you so much, and I mean that from the bottom of my hypothalamus.


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